Only as I grew did I realize that there was more to it - the game, and the family dynamics that came along with it, were to be cherished. In nostalgic hindsight I realize that these games, although frequent, were special family moments. I now understand why my mother was there rain or shine, even though she very rarely played. This is what she had grown up with, this was family. Poker brought us together, poker defined Saturday night.
At the time, however, nostalgia meant little me. The game and the culture was just so damned interesting. What was it that made this game the highlight of everyone's week? What was it that made tempers flare and insults fly? I was one of those perpetual question machine children: What's higher, a straight or a flush? What if two people both have three of a kind? What if? What if? What if? My grandparents and great uncles/aunts had been playing for decades, while my aunts and uncles had learned on the lap of the great grandparents that I would never have a chance to meet, and they indulged me all of my curiosities. The game had its own language. "You son of a bitch," really meant "confound you, for you have bested me this hand!" "Ante a lick," meant the ante was .15, a dime was just as likely to be called a "thin ten," and opening for a nickel was a "sensible bet." If the final bet of a hand was a scant nickel, the call was likely to be accompanied with "I'd pay a nickel to watch an ant piss ... I don't care whose aunt it is!" The dealer calling "High Chicago" was met with a chorus of boos, but the boos that abated when the game was "High Chicago Roll Your Own."**
I remember that most everyone had their favorite game:
Grandmother: Five card stud - greeted by almost universal cussing.***
Grandfather: "Suspicion" (the name we've always used for five card draw)
Uncle Steve: 3 low with 2 draws (a game that, as far as I know, he invented)
Uncle Tom: Five card stud - greeted by almost universal cussing
Aunt Lorrie and Davena: Straight seven (seven card stud) or a Chicago variation of seven card stud.
Aunt Joy: Jacks or better - five card draw but the game cannot begin (open) unless someone has at least a pair of jacks or better after the initial cards are dealt - also greeted by unanimous cussing****
As I watched and as I asked questions, I gradually learned to play the game. And once I knew how to play, I was hooked. I would scrounge every scrap of change in a four state area and annoy the piss out of my immediate family by asking for everything they have. I would show up a half-hour early for every game. I tried desperately to avoid giving my hand away*****. I adopted the language of the game as my own. I came to love poker.
And then it faded away. I went to college, and even though I never left town, I lost interest in going home on Saturday nights. Family drama broke up the core group of players with petty grudges. The games went from weekly occurrence to special occasion, and eventually from special occasion to even more special occasion. All good things, as the cliche goes, must end.
Why bring this up now? Because I had the chance to play again this past weekend for the first time in nearly two years, and it all came rushing back to me. The family, the camaraderie, the culture, and yeah, the winning - I came out four dollars ahead of where I started (quite a bit for a game in which most bets are measured in nickels and dimes). At the same time, the cruelty of age is this: it wasn't the same. My grandparents weren't there, as a 9pm start was too late for them. A couple of my cousins stayed only until they'd lost a few dollars and then went home to their kids and an early bed time. My uncle Tom was more interested in the "Captain and Cokes" than the cards on the table.
Time, and memory, are a cruel mistress.
* Hold'em is a perfectly adequate game that is useful when you're trying to play poker with 20 other people (read: never). My issue with Hold'em is that the game is reduced to sheer probabilities instead of being played by "gut." Hold'em is a game for statisticians, not riverboat gamblers.
** Chicago is a 7-card stud variation in which half the pot goes to the person with the lowest spade in the hole (low Chicago) or highest spade in the hole (high Chicago). All players will prefer "Roll your own" because all cards are dealt to you face down and you get to choose what is exposed. Thus you can both disguise the quality of your hand AND avoid having the Chicago spade dealt to you face up, where it is of no use to you.
*** In five card stud you are dealt one card down and four cards up, meaning that there is very little mystery. Grumbling results because it is not uncommon for a high pair to win a hand, nor for a hand to be determined entirely by visible cards. Boring.
**** Jacks or Better leads to grumbling because if no one can "open," the ante must be made again and the hand must be re-dealt. The upside of this is that Jacks can lead to some significant pots to be won.
***** My tell become just that - when I had a really good hand I would get serious and quiet. I tried too hard to be nondescript.
I remember that most everyone had their favorite game:
Grandmother: Five card stud - greeted by almost universal cussing.***
Grandfather: "Suspicion" (the name we've always used for five card draw)
Uncle Steve: 3 low with 2 draws (a game that, as far as I know, he invented)
Uncle Tom: Five card stud - greeted by almost universal cussing
Aunt Lorrie and Davena: Straight seven (seven card stud) or a Chicago variation of seven card stud.
Aunt Joy: Jacks or better - five card draw but the game cannot begin (open) unless someone has at least a pair of jacks or better after the initial cards are dealt - also greeted by unanimous cussing****
As I watched and as I asked questions, I gradually learned to play the game. And once I knew how to play, I was hooked. I would scrounge every scrap of change in a four state area and annoy the piss out of my immediate family by asking for everything they have. I would show up a half-hour early for every game. I tried desperately to avoid giving my hand away*****. I adopted the language of the game as my own. I came to love poker.
And then it faded away. I went to college, and even though I never left town, I lost interest in going home on Saturday nights. Family drama broke up the core group of players with petty grudges. The games went from weekly occurrence to special occasion, and eventually from special occasion to even more special occasion. All good things, as the cliche goes, must end.
Why bring this up now? Because I had the chance to play again this past weekend for the first time in nearly two years, and it all came rushing back to me. The family, the camaraderie, the culture, and yeah, the winning - I came out four dollars ahead of where I started (quite a bit for a game in which most bets are measured in nickels and dimes). At the same time, the cruelty of age is this: it wasn't the same. My grandparents weren't there, as a 9pm start was too late for them. A couple of my cousins stayed only until they'd lost a few dollars and then went home to their kids and an early bed time. My uncle Tom was more interested in the "Captain and Cokes" than the cards on the table.
Time, and memory, are a cruel mistress.
* Hold'em is a perfectly adequate game that is useful when you're trying to play poker with 20 other people (read: never). My issue with Hold'em is that the game is reduced to sheer probabilities instead of being played by "gut." Hold'em is a game for statisticians, not riverboat gamblers.
** Chicago is a 7-card stud variation in which half the pot goes to the person with the lowest spade in the hole (low Chicago) or highest spade in the hole (high Chicago). All players will prefer "Roll your own" because all cards are dealt to you face down and you get to choose what is exposed. Thus you can both disguise the quality of your hand AND avoid having the Chicago spade dealt to you face up, where it is of no use to you.
*** In five card stud you are dealt one card down and four cards up, meaning that there is very little mystery. Grumbling results because it is not uncommon for a high pair to win a hand, nor for a hand to be determined entirely by visible cards. Boring.
**** Jacks or Better leads to grumbling because if no one can "open," the ante must be made again and the hand must be re-dealt. The upside of this is that Jacks can lead to some significant pots to be won.
***** My tell become just that - when I had a really good hand I would get serious and quiet. I tried too hard to be nondescript.
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